Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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