last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
