I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Randomize
