My underwear smells like fireworks.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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