is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
