I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
