WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
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