She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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