In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
