a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Panties = found
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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