one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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