i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
he puts the penis in happiness.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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