I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
