I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Randomize
