nut hugger
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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