nut hugger
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Randomize
