Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize