You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
i came on her dog
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Randomize
