What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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