Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
just tell him i said nine months
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Rumble strips road head = magical
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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