last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Randomize
