too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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