just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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