I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
