I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
