Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
