Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
BRING THE BAGELS
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