We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
