your room smells of hookers.
And success
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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