She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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