Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
