"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
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