Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
