Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
