i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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