WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
