Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
