you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
