At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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