I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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