God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Do vagina's smell?
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
soo... how was my night?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
