It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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