she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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