OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
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