Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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