I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
