Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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