Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
A bitchslap is in order.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
