we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
