When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Randomize
